I kinda wanna cry, I kinda don’t.

Published
by
Sally
on 23 April, 2008
in random stuff and training
.

I’ve been running twice a day at least 2-3 times a week for the last 3 weeks. It’s usually intentional, and the second run usually involves running with 9-11 year old girls or bringing in the last of my women in my running class, but I’m feeling fatigued. I’ve been riding everywhere, strength training, running, trail running, taking care of sale prep (BIG ASS SALE AT REI!!!! BUY SHIT, BUY SHIT!!!!), and sometimes it hits me that my legs are really quite fatigued. Sometimes I just think about the “dark place” from my last post and I run faster and harder. Sometimes I ignore it and think about how high my metabolism must be right now. Other times I think about how lucky I am that I can push myself this hard.

I’ve referred a few times to feeling like I don’t have time left. That’s due to my knee that does not have all the cartilage. I really don’t know how many marathons I have left in my knee, and I feel a lot of pressure to break 4 hours. I KNOW that I have it in me, that’s the frustrating part. I know I can go the distance, I know that I have the mental capability, I know that I have the strength. I just don’t know how much more training/running/racing my knee can handle. Most of the time it’s fine. Occasionally I feel like I need to take a month off. Usually, I have pain and it randomly buckles when I’m walking. It adds up to SUCK. I never thought I would be the person who had to deal with a body that would not allow my goals to happen. I’m holding on to the ideal situation; that I can complete 2-3 more marathons before my knee is shot.

Shall we try for one more together? I would love to see Toots, Sally, Lumpy, Coworker #1, and maybe even Banana (now that she’ll be done with school) run one together. Lumpy and I are kind of already in the works for Dublin ‘09, if you could all be convinced to come along.

1 Response to “I kinda wanna cry, I kinda don’t.”

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  1. 1 Toots
    27 April, 2008 at 23:20

    Hmmm…let’s see…I’ve never been to Ireland and I’ve always wanted to go. However, it is during the the school year again (thinking of Punxsk8erdude). I’ve also been wanting to run Berlin, but it’s in September (begining of school year also). Got to think about it.

    Still want to the the SanFran Women’s? Not this year, nor the next if we end up doing Dublin (same month usually a week apart - up for a “back to back”? j/k)…maybe 2010? Wow, sounds so far away….

    I know I’m just rambling…I really should just go to bed. Good night.

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